I am going to give you an opportunity to do some reframing here.
A longtime client of mine decided to use her coaching session to try and get some insight for her husbands struggling consulting business. He really wants to attract more clients. His story, as she tells it is, he says things like “I am no good in sales” and “it’s because of my age”. (in his 60’s).
These are facts they are not truths. Lets break it down.
He is not good in sales – That may not even be true, because after I did more discovery, I can tell, he isn’t even having sales conversations. He is blogging and welcoming feedback, (which he is getting a lot of, but not from his customers) so, he isn’t even having marketing or sales conversations. He is just engaging in dialogue with other people who want to comment or share their opinions.
So what can we learn from this? First, lets figure out what the true challenge or problem is. How do you do that? Find someone who can identify your TRUE block and get you moving. If you don’t know what to do, or how to do it, you have 2 choices. You can sit, wish, lament and continue to tell your story of “why not” or you can take action.
In this case his wife took action and within 10 minutes with me, we found 3 things that he wasn’t doing, that he should be doing. Things that would increase his business and they had nothing to do with him not being a good sales person, or his age. Which if you recall, is what he was stuck on.
Ok, lets address the age thing. A) You can hide behind it and stay stuck in that story (no one has told him that he is too old by the way), it is his perception. Or you can reframe it as I did for them. I see his age as a positive.
It is no lie there is a generation of entitlement out there, (remember I coach leaders and their staff every day, I see both sides). There is definitely a generation of employees that think their problems are the companies problems, that their every need should be taken into consideration and concessions made to make sure they are comfortable so they can be productive. Ummm…. not entirely untrue but this entitlement group has gone way too far.
Given this perspective, It was easy for me to reframe for them, “The age thing”.
Look at his experience, look at his track record and results, look at his work ethic and what he will bring to the table, his maturity, experience and accountability. This is reframing or changing perception.
Your turn… Take a belief of yours and reframe it. Maybe it is about how you can’t do something because…. (fill in the blank)
First thing, let go of the belief. Put it behind you by saying “ I used to …” or “Up until now” this is setting it free as a past problem, not a current companion.
Secondly, ask yourself, “if I didn’t believe that was true, how can I see this differently” (insert new perception).
If you just do this, things will get a little easier for you. If you make it a daily practice, things will get a lot easier for you.
If you want to really make a shift, contact me and lets look at creating permanent change.
As always, I got your back!